Avast me hearties, don’t go blaming this blog on the Valentine’s Day. The real scallywag it be the stick of Black Jack gum me tween mateys be giving me. “It’s so YOU, Baba Yaga,” they sez to me they sez, “Black for a witch and Jack for a pirate.” Son of a sea dog, they not be knowing the half of it. It was like as if that thar gum he be a time machine – takes me right back to me times with me love, Black Jack Higgins.
Black Jack be a member of me dad’s pirate crew. He gots no place to go when they ship it be in port so me dad lets him stay with us. The first time he came he sticks up his nose and sniffs like as if our eye of newt stew it be bad grub. The next time he comes I be giving him the big time stink eye, but he shoots me the look that sez, “Arr, I be a lucky buccaneer to be here with you, Baba Yaga.” Stap me vitals! I be the witch, but I fell under his spell. When they be at sea I waits for me dad to come home, but I waits for Black Jack more. Then one day me dad’s new first matey tells him black cats be unlucky.
Aye aye, Black Jack Higgins not be no scruffy pirate. He be they ship’s cat. Every good pirate ship it gots it a cat so as to catch all they rats so as they not be eating up all the food. So me dad he gets him a buff tabby cat and Black Jack he gets to stay home with us permanent-like. Yar! What pirate-talking witch not be loving her a pirate ship’s black cat? I makes him me sidekick. That black cat he rides tall on the lip of me flying soup bowl. Oh, the places we went! Too bad he be using up all his nine lives 77-1/2 years ago. But he still be me love.
Gang way mateys, this blog be reminding me I needs to go shopping. Why for? Tune in next month and you be finding out.