October 2018 – Baba Blogga Yaga

October 27, 2018

Baba Yaga meets the Halloweensie challenge

Arr, they challenge be that you writes you a 100-word story using “cauldron,” “shiver,” and “howl.” Here be me story (with help from me matey Pat) and I be sticking to it.

The wolf, the witch, and the cauldron

“EEUW!” The cauldron shivered. “Not eye of newt AGAIN. Totally slimy.” It flipped over and dumped all the eyeballs out.

“Hey,” the witch said, “I needed those for my wolf-repelling spell.”

Bad timing. A wolf burst out of the forest. But as he charged at the witch, his front feet slipped on the eyes of newt. He somersaulted into the cauldron.

“Too bad I’m a vegan,” the witch said. “Although hmm, maybe I COULD go for some wolf stew.”

The wolf shot out of the cauldron and sped off. The witch and the cauldron howled with laughter.

If’n you wants to read you more Halloweensie poop (or do one yerself), go here

October 12, 2018

…but wait mateys, thar be more twisty pirate talking!

So when a lubber sez to another lubber he sez, “Hey John, the boss told me to show you the ropes,” it means he be teaching John about they job. Stap me vitals, that be a waste of a epic phrase!

Here be how I sees it going down. Say you gots you a swabby with some important poop he not be spilling. You dangles they ropes in front of his mug like so:

When he spots those ropes he be singing his guts out like as if he be in a fancy schmancy opera. Yo ho ho, he be telling you things you not even be asking.