“Ahoy, Baba Yaga,” me friend sez to me the other day she sez. ”It was all ‘shiver me timbers’ on Talk Like a Pirate Day. What does that mean anyway?” Well mateys, here be what I knows and what I thinks about it.
The first time I heard of they shivering timbers I be but a witchling. Me pirate dad he whammed his thumb with a hammer. He started out going “Aw, shi…,” but then he spied me watching him so he finished up with “…ver me timbers.” I asked him what that “shiver me timbers” meant when it be at home.
He told me they timbers be the ribs of a ship. When a storm blows in it picks up the ship then slaps her back down. That be making her timbers shiver. The swabbies they gets all surprised and mayhaps a bit afeared so they sez to each other they sez, “Shiver me timbers.”
Arr, “shiver me timbers” it be a mock curse on account of you can say it and even yer grandmother not be giving you the stink eye. Son of a son of a sea dog, that be giving me a killer idea. Why not we be writing our own mock curses? That be making they lingo live and grow. More on that next time. But for now, may yer timbers never shiver.
If’n you wants to read you more Halloweensie poop (or do one yerself), go 
Stap me vitals, that not be pirate talking but it should oughta be. “Run him up the flagpole” be a perfect punishment for they worstest skulldugger of all time. He lies up there while they Jolly Roger whaps him in his forehead, they seagulls uses his face like as if it be they poop deck, and they rival pirates larfs themselves silly when they spots him with they spyglasses.
Baba Blogga Yaga 